Bueno post, el original en inglés:
Spoiler: |
GuitarZan, consider the excercise of not looking away first an experiment. You'll learn that holding eye contact is not appropriate for all situations, it's true. You learn through both positive and negative feedback. That's the thing, I make no promises that you won't creep people out. I say, creep em out if you have to. Creep em out as many times as you need to learn how to not creep people out. It'd be hard to tabulate everything I've learned from my eye contact experiments, but that's not really my purpose. I'm just encouraging people to experiment with eye contact for themselves.
By the way somebody mentioned "David Shade's Eye Contact Experiments" and I'm pretty sure that's what inspired me to do the eye contact experiments I did. But I never knew the source of the article I read, and never saw it again, and don't remember much about the article anymore - I mostly just remember being scared shitless to look people in the eyes, and not having any idea what to do when a girl actually eye fucked the shit out of me from across the room. I look people in the eyes habitually now. My eyes follow my interest. I look people in the eyes when I am talking to them, or when they are talking to me, or when I want their attention, or I want them to know they have mine. I consider firm eye contact to be the most potent emotional communication channel between two people. This is why it is so ubiquitos to social dynamics. If I want to convey attraction, presence, or any emotional state to a girl, the best way to do it is with my eyes. If I want to know on a deep instinctual level what a girl is feeling, the best way to do with is by watching her eyes. The way it feels to me, if two people look in the eyes for long enough, their emotional state syncs up. So when I'm intensely attracted to a girl, and I look her in the eyes, if she holds the eye contact that means she is going to feel intensely attracted to me as well, and we both will feel more attracted as a result. She will want you, and she will know you want her, and she will want you to want her, and she will basically just be standing there waiting for you to come and get her. Seriously. DO NOT do this to a girl and puss out. It's downright cruel. You will hurt her feelings. A few more cool/interesting experiences I wanted to share: Alone with a girl, 1-on-1, I often just look her into her eyes and just... look. I'm not thinking anything, just taking her in. I tend to enjoy this. GIrls LOVE it. I'll see in their eyes that their wheels are turning. Girls will ask me "What are you thinking about?" and my honest answer is "nothing." I've been told more times than I can count "I can't figure you out." Other cool things I've been told are "Usually, when a guy looks at me like that, I know that I have him. With you, I'm never sure." "The way you look at me scares me, because I know you're in control" I never used to be able to sit with a person, and stare into their eyes, without feeling akward, not until I was able to hold eye contact in general without feeling akward. Now I've come to realize that it's the best way to show a girl that you are comfortable with yourself. Girls almost -expect- to see some sort of neediness in your eyes, and when they don't, they find it confusing, intriguing, alluring, and addicting. Eye contact really was the cure for what ailed my social life. I dated a 28 year old model who owned her own photography business, and I remember feeling so out of my league, but when I looked in her eyes and saw her attraction for me, I knew in my core that I had her, and it was an extremely comforting feeling. So I kept looking into her eyes. We were sitting on a black velvet couch in some bar she suggested, and she told me "Nobody is able to look me in the eyes like you do" and then she started telling me some really deep things about her life, and how she puts on an act to seem confident, and how she has to look good to feel good and why she spends so much time on her appearance, and how she's been hurt in the past, etc. I was in so far over my head, and all it took to feel like I was up to the next level was too look into her eyes more, and I was at ease. When she saw me so at ease, magic happened. Next thing I know we're ducking into a dark corner, so she can rub my cock without the whole world seeing. I can't count how many times now I've stared into a girl's eyes and watched her fall for me. When I'm at a bar and I manage to catch a girl's eyes, I don't have to spit game. All I have to do is walk up, and reach out for her hands. She will give them to me. Then I pull her in close, and wrap my arms loosely around her waist. Actually, if you saw Brad-'s video he posted a while, you've seen this. What I'm telling you now is how to do that - and consistently! It's simpler than you ever imagined. Look into a girls eyes, and think about fucking her so vividly that you pop wood. You've probably heard that before. I'm telling you now, do not underestimate this simple skill. If you catch a girl's eyes from across the room, she's yours. Sometimes, when I'm in set, and I don't want to walk away that moment, I catch a girl's eyes from across the room, and you know what? If I convey the right things (I see you, I want you), I can stay in set and keep chatting, and she will see that I am "busy" and actually wait for me. Sometimes the girl will even come over to me, or at least near me, or do whatever she has to in order to make it work for me. I call it my "Tractor Beam Eyes", which I consider to be basically the same thing as "laser eyes". Simply the most devastating tool in my aresnal. Just as a note, I do not feeling like I am attracting these girls with my eye contact. I am simply sealing the deal with girls who are already attracted to me, which you'd be suprised how many girls you will attract from across the room just by competently navigating the social landscape, and being unafraid to be noticed. Girls will stand in the shadows, quietly wishing you'd notice them, and when you do... magic. It can be so easy it's not even funny. When you have these moments with girls before you approach them, it doesn't even feel like an approach. There is no need for an opener, because your eyes have already been having a deep conversation. These are the times when overgaming means death, because you are so far PAST the need for fancy lines that it'd just look stupid if you tried too hard to get her attention. You already HAVE it. You make her feel like the only girl in the room, and she will make you feel like the only guy in the room. You can lock eyes with a girl who is with her boyfriend/husband, and have a private naughty moment while he remains oblivious. The emotional reads you get off of these girls can be so much fun. It's like you can tell they feel guitly for wanting you so bad, but they're enjoying it too much to stop. Be careful about looking at someone else's girl like that though, that'll get you into fights. TRUST ME. I've made that mistake. I've pulled girls off the dancefloor while I chilled at the bar, using eye contact, often while dancing with some slick guy who was better looking than me and obviously had more money, judging by the way he was dressed. It's a pleasure to chill at the bar, relaxed, and watch a girl completely lose interest with some guy while he has no idea why. You can outgame another dude without ever opening your mouth, if you use your eyes right. Girls are emotional creatures. The best tool you have to give them that is your eyes. The next is your body. The last is your words. Your words can be powerful, sure, but your eyes are more powerful with less effort. Eye contact is intimate. I've heard girls complain that guys today don't know what real intimacy is. If you can be comfortable staring into a girl's eyes for a long period of time, she will respect you for it. She will overestimate you. She will want to submit to you, and she will fantasize about being "your" girl. I am not joking when I say that I have sat back and watched girls fall in love with me. I have told a girl "you're in love with me" and saw her jaw drop, "I didn't say that" "You said it with your eyes" "It scares me how well you read me." I have told girls things about themselves that they didn't want me to know, only because I picked it up from them while looking in their eyes. I have caught them lying to me, or hiding things, or realized they had a romantic history with a guy who came up in conversation, or seen that they were scared of being hurt. "The eyes are the windows to the soul" |